8 Things That Have Crossed Your Mind While Adulting
Doesn't it seem like you mentally stop aging after you turn 21. It's like you are physically getting older, but you aren't really maturing at the same speed #storyofourlives. Learning how to adult is hard, not to mention exhaustingggg. Sometimes we wish we majored in majoring in majors. Is that even possible :O? Anyways, once you are tired of Frat boys and cheap beer, you are pretty much on the border of adulting.
Adulting is a tricky thing to master since you are attempting to mimic the lifestyle of an adult, but on the budget of a barista. Do I want to move to NY and work for a fashion empire that also grows organic hydroponic veggies from their roof? Duh. Will I also be living in a hole on the corner of WTF and Is-That-Alive. Probably. Regardless, here are 8 things that have totally crossed your mind while you were in the process of adulting.
1. Tax Sucks
Okay, so I'm already practically working for free. Now you want to take 30% of absolutely nothing away! #WTFbro. But if you must take my money, can you at least fix that pothole on Grand. kthxbai.
2. Why is life so expensive
When you move out, you realize that life essentials actually cost money. This includes toothpaste, dish washing soap, and more importantly- toilet paper. Paying for toilet paper is basically like wiping your ass with a dollar bill. Once you realize this, you eventually start "borrowing" TP rolls from work until your next trip to Costco.
3. Is this microwavable
Obviously you still need to eat while you are adulting, but the quality of your food is going to be debatable. Who knew cooking and feeding yourself would be so hard and time consuming! #imissdiningdollars. Thus, this leads you to beg the question, is this microwavable.
4. I thought internet came with rent
Apparently "paying for rent" literally means paying for the space that shelters you from natural disasters. Oh you want some LIGHT to see the WATER you are using for your HOT shower. All of that is extra...with a service fee. Want to rant about it on Twitter? I don't think you bought the package that included internet...
5. My alcohol tolerance went to shit
Okay, I guess adulating isn't that bad if you are getting paid more than your Abercrombie "modeling" job (aka the folding slave). And it is only reasonable to use some of this excess money to celebrate. Keyword = celebrate. God knows what happened between college and now, but you can no longer do shots chased by water and continue raging until dawn.
6. Laundry is actually a thing
No. I'm talking about the actual machine. As if remembering to do laundry was hard enough, we now have to figure out a way to get TO the laundry machine and have enough quarters to do the actual deed itself.
7. Hating customer service with a passion
At some point in your adulting days, you will have to deal with customer service. They are the friendliest yet most unbearably repetitive people you will ever meet. You are probably on hold for a hour only to walk your problem through 5 different representatives for 2 more hours before the solution is "resolved." And by resolved I mean a ticket was put in for "further assessment" #shootmenow.
8. Where does dust come from
Growing up, our parents have told us to clean our rooms, do the dishes, but never to "clean the dust." I can't even... Like where DOES it comes from!? Regardless, it's a bitch to clean cause once it settles and forms its own dust army, you will find writing "clean the dust" on your to do list. Trust, it's a process.